Perfection Is the Goal, Peace is What it Brings

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Residential and what not

Im out of treatment, residential was awful, php/iop was worse. yet here i am again. Not doing so well, and planning to lose more weight.
Where is the logic?

My mind says "Hello eating disorder, I'm so sorry I gave recovery that bullshit try" sobs uncontrollably "please for give me, tell my parents im sorry, I can't look like this anymore. Recovery is not for me."
Eating disorder replies, "Oh silly girl I never left. Come here."

If anyone reads this, please say hi, if not so i'll follow your blog, but because I could really use the company.

with love,


  1. Hey! I definitely follow your blog, and I love reading all your posts! Xx
    I'll try to comment as much as I can.
    I'm sorry that recovery didn't work for you, but I'll still be here to support you in any ways I can. (: Xx

  2. It saddens me to know your stuck in this seemingly endless cycle. I hope you are able to fight your way out soon. Good luck and I'm here if you ever need something.


  3. I'm sorry that recovery didn't work out but if you need someone to talk to or any support, I'm here!


  4. I think we all battle between recovery and disorder. I think the most important thing is to always keep them both at an arms reach. If recovery scares you, inch towards it very just ONE extra morsel of food each meal. Balance is key, theres a good middle ground between gaining weight and becoming super unhealthy, the hard part is finding and keeping it! at least for me anyway


  5. hey ell
    im sorry recovery didnt work for you,i really hope things get better for you,and please post more often,im in the same frame of mind as you are,im a med student so i can relate to the stress,love you


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